Ellagrace's dead husband

Interview with Dave  for The Obitch Queen Novel

Author: Dave tell me why you cheated on Ellagrace after all those years of marriage?

Dave: She bored me. She was fun when were first married. Then the  kids came along and took up most of her time. As they got older we spent more time at the country club. It was like Ellagrace became a stepferd wife—she was one them—except I don’t think she cheated on me like the other wives did.

Author: She did stick by me throughout all my cheating on her and my business deals, that I’ll give her. But by then the love was gone. She simply stayed married to me for the same reason I stayed her. It was convenient.

Author: So why did you take up with Mary Mayberry?

Dave: he shrugs. I knew her from high school. She was wild and we had a fling back then. I accidently ran into her at a bachelor party for one of my clients. They had strippers and she was one of them. She suggested we get together for a good time. I was ready. Ellagrace and I hadn’t slept together for a few years. She was always too tired and I was not interested and so it goes. I was ready to have some fun.

Author: How long had you been seeing her before you died?

Dave: I don’t know, a few years I guess. 

Author: Where you seeing other women, too?

Dave: A few. Nothing serious. Then Mary, who owned her own escort service, asked if I would be interested in buying into her business. I was losing money in my business and  she assured me I’d be making good money with her. All I had to do was bring her some new clients, men I knew. It was safe she assured me. After all, she had some big politician clients.

Author: Who were they?

Dave: The mayor, a few policemen, a senator. Some of the men at the country club liked the idea of having a pretty young thing on their arm when they attended functions. Afterwards, they had a pretty young mistress to follow up their nights. At first Mary paid me well for the new customers. Then about 6 months ago the money got less and less. She said she lost some clients. I knew business was bad for everyone. I had learned the bank was foreclosing on my investment business. She suggested I take out a mortgage on my house, which was paid off. I told her Ellagrace would never allow that. She told me not to worry, she’d take care of things.

Author: And did she?

Dave: Yes, she did. She forged Ellagrace’s name on the documents. Her cousin owned the mortgage company. Then she insisted I invest more into her business. I did, but had a hard time sleeping at night. I knew what I did was wrong. She gave me some drugs to help me sleep. I later learned they were addictive. I had to pay for them. When all the money was gone, she said she didn’t need me anymore.

Meanwhile, I had let her keep her business at an old farm house I had bought with my money. I lied and told her I had rented it from a cousin. She didn’t know I had a small business on the back or the property and had a man getting the honey and selling it for me. She was terrified of bugs and snakes and I told her the property was filled with them and not to go beyond the house.

Author: Dave, who killed you?

Dave: I suspected Mary of putting something into my drinks or maybe food. I lost weight, I felt like hell and she kept telling me if I’d take my vitamins she gave me I’d get well. I did. Then one night she insisted on having sex with me. She gave me a Viagra, or so she said. We didn’t get very far when I had terrific chest pains and my heart stopped. I watched her stare at me. A man came into the room and they talked. She had my money, he said, and it was time to get out of dodge and to go onto their next venture—selling babies.

Author: Who was the man?

Dave:  Shady.

Author: Shady? But he’s dead now, too.

Dave: laugh. No, he’s not dead. What I heard is he and Mary were having plastic surgery, changed their names and buying a house in North FL and then setting up a so-called adoption agency—or selling babies. Some of the girls who worked in the escort service got knocked up and don’t want to keep their babies. Mary assured them they’d get paid and she’ll find good homes for the babies.

Author: What about the airplane he fell out of? They said he died.

Dave:  And what did Melzie say? He was a coward and would never jump. That’s true. He got some poor smuck who wanted to skydive take his place in the plane.  The police were told it was Shady. They didn’t like Shady—he was being investigated for bilking people out of their money and was about to be arrested. The parachute not opening saved them the trouble of having to arrest him. Case closed.

Author: But why would someone break into his house and kill the coach?

Dave: Because Shady forgot to get his book with all the names of those men who used the escort service and all the housewives who made extra money that way. He couldn’t remember where in the house he hid it. As for the coach, he just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Author: Who killed the coach:

Dave: I’m not sure. I think Shady has an inside with someone at the police department who he pays well to help him.

Author: Do you know who is making those phone calls to Melzie?

Dave: Again he laughs. Yes. Shady has been taking voice lessons to learn to change his voice like the actors do. He thinks Melzie is stupid and he is enjoying these games. He’s not as smart as he thinks he is, though.

Author: Is Ellagrace in danger?

Dave: I hope not, but she is nosy and may find herself in a pickle. I hope her boyfriend can keep her safe. I don’t want to see her harmed. I did enough damage to her.

Author: Do you have any advice on how to catch Shady and Mary Mayberry?

Dave: No. I hope the PI catches him. But I have a feeling Mary Mayberry will get her comeuppance. Shady probably  has someone else waiting for him.

Author: RIP